Tuesday 19 August 2008

Tinned Soup And Bladders


You know, I really should be pounding away on the exercise bike instead of sitting here writing this blog but, somehow, I can’t muster the enthusiasm at 3.00 p.m. on a Tuesday afternoon. Hasta Mañana Baby! Still, at least I had a reasonable night’s sleep, apart from having to get up again at 3.30 a.m. for a wee. Why is it always 3.30 a.m.? Does my bladder actually have an inbuilt alarm clock? I’ve always prided myself on the impressive capacity of my bladder but, since embarking on my menopausal journey, I am finding that I have to get up in the night to relieve myself, which is most irritating in the extreme.

Menopausal insomnia is a pain in the wotsits. Many’s the night I’ve fallen asleep the minute my head has hit the pillow, only to awake abruptly for no apparent reason (or for a wee.) Once the sleep cycle has been disturbed, it’s the devil’s own job to get back off again. It reminds me of the scene in the Singing Detective where Michael Gambon, who plays a psoriasis sufferer, is having his body greased by a very attractive nurse. In order to prevent his normal bodily functions from functioning, he tries to think of random things with which to take his mind off what is happening and thus prevent said bodily functions from embarrassing him. I too have lain there trying to think random soporific thoughts in a futile attempt to rejoin the world of Morpheus, however, Margaret Thatcher is not one of them.

I felt very virtuous following my foray to Tesco yesterday, where I laden my trolley with a variety of Weight Watchers tinned soups. I was just in the middle of a self-righteous brag to my husband about how low calorie they were, when I discovered, to my horror, that Heinz soups actually had less calories than Weight Watchers. All my good intentions thus came to nought. And why do they put the calorific value in terms of ½ tin? Apart from little old ladies (of which, I am not!), who actually eats half a tin? Think I’ll make my own in future. Anyone got any good low cal recipes?

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